No Homo
by StripedHatter
Summary: Hogwarts is hella LGBT , Harry's unobservant, and I ship everything; a bunch of drabbles! Contains: [DeanxSeamus], [GinnyxLuna], [Wolfstar] [ace!Charlie]
1. The Striped T-Shirt -deamus-

"'Deamus'? That's a thing? Really? Huh. Let me just, check the tumblr tag and..." *skip forward two hours* "DEAMUS IS REAL, they're so cute, Harry's so oblivious, aww"  
 _-the result of drinking coffee after midnight, gandalf537's "101 names we could have used", and shipping the gays-_

 _featuring demisexual seamus and bisexual dean_

* * *

"Isn't that Dean's shirt?"

Seamus looked up to meet the sparkling eyes of Ginny Weasley, and felt a blush crawl into his neck, accompanied by a faint nudge of irritation at seeing her. He forced the irritation down; she was with Dean now, and that was that. So what if his best mate was spending more time with her lately? That was no problem for Seamus.

"What's it to you?" Seamus asked. "Dean and I have swapped closed for the past four years, can't really remember whose shirt this is."

It was the blue-and-gray striped v-neck, and Dean had only just gotten it over the summer. Seamus knew it was Dean's and had never once borrowed it, till today.

"I borrowed it last week when we were down at the lake," Ginny said. "Thought it was his, is all."

"Well, we can't really say." He dropped the book he'd been reading on the table. "I've got to go."

He rose abruptly and left, taking frustrated strides down the corridors till the walls blurred around him. The source of that little nudge of irritation remained a mystery to him; something about Ginny just rubbed him the wrong way lately. He'd been fine with her before- for years, even- but it was the same spark of irritation he'd felt in fifth year, when Dean fancied Angelica Johnson, and in third, when Dean fancied Padma Patil. He chalked it up to being that Dean was annoying when he fancied a girl, and usually spent too much time trying to impress her, which meant Seamus would have nothing to do for long periods of time.

Seamus had come to the conclusion he just didn't feel attraction a long time ago. He'd never had a crush on anyone; he could admit some girls were, yeah, very pretty, and had amiable qualities, but he hadn't... Felt the way about anyone how Dean felt about Ginny.

The Clocktower Courtyard appeared before him with a gust of fresh wind, a breeze blowing in off the lake smelling of rain, though the sun shone yellow overhead. Seamus leaned on a column of brick and for a heartbeat closed his eyes.

"Oi, you slim git! Heard you nipped my shirt again!"

Seamus opened his eyes with an automatic grin as he saw Dean strolling toward him. "And what are you gonna do about it, mate?"

"Nothing," Dean shrugged as he reached Seamus, folding his arms across his chest. "You've been stealing my shirts for the past four years. It'd feel weird if you weren't wearing something of mine."

Seamus chuckled and felt he had to agree. "Well, much as this shirt looks good on you, I think it looks better on me."

Dean rolled his eyes. "Whatever you say, Seamus." He leaned a bit closer. "Keep the shirt; I don't care. If Ginny asks, it's yours."

Seamus chuckled again and Dean walked off. He noticed that blush had moved back into his neck. He lifted the v-neck collar to his nose for a heartbeat, inhaling the familiar scent of Dean, and then exhaled slowly.

The realisation hit like walking into a brick wall.

Holy shit- he had a crush.

On his best mate.

 **-TTT-**

"And she ACTUALLY thinks I shoved her! She's tough, but I'd never lay my hands on a girl like that! I could never shove Ginny! The breakup was inevitable, of course, but not for that reason! I'm not- I'm not abusive!"

"Of course you're not," Seamus sighed.

He'd been happy for the first hour, even, to sit and listen to Dean recount the details of his and Ginny's breakup. Seamus hadn't minded a bit, because some desperate part of him was happy at just the fact he'd no longer have to watch Dean snog someone. It was just easier when Dean wasn't showering someone with affection right in front of Seamus. But now it had been three hours of breakup ranting, and part of Seamus was just ready to get some rest.

"Sorry, am I boring you?" Dean snapped, his tone drenched in sarcasm. Seamus's eyes flashed to his best friend's.

"Well, it HAS been three hours," Seamus answered, and Dean glared.

"Great, first my girlfriend, now my best mate doesn't even care."

 _"Dean."_

The other boy collapsed onto his bed, and then chuckled softly. "Sorry, mate. Just been a long night."

"You might want to watch who you take that out on," Seamus suggested, keeping his tone amiable.

"You're right, you're right." Dean sighed. "Hey, Seamus?"

"Yeah?"

"Think I'll ever find love?"

Seamus chuckled, ignoring his own flares of panic and hope. "Yeah, mate. You'll find love."

"But with who?"

Seamus held in his laugh and leaned over, patting Dean's knee. "You'll figure it out one day. There's someone out there perfect for you."

Dean groaned, and Seamus let it rest for the night.

 **-TTT-**

The castle was in complete disarray, but the song of victory rang through it. Everywhere, couples reunited, friends hugged, families cried. Death existed alongside the triumph and it filled the air just as potently. Seamus searched the halls for one single face- one he had painfully lost sight of an hour before. They'd stuck together all through their horrid last year of Hogwarts, enacting the old Dumbledore's Army operations in the Room of Requirement; Ginny Weasley was not only tolerable- she was basically their leader.

Then, in the midst of all the fighting, Seamus has spotted one of the second-years nearly get stunned by a Death Eater. He'd had to leave Dean and now part of him regretted ever losing sight of his best friend. He'd managed to get the second-year back to the Dungeons, where the Slytherins watched the kid, and when he came back he'd been so caught up trying to stay alive he hadn't had time to find Dean through the chaos. Now the battle was over, Voldemort defeated and the Death Eaters powerless and being captured, but Seamus had yet to find Dean.

He refused to search in the Great Hall among the corpses. His friend wouldn't be there. He was determined of it.

There- someone. He grabbed on to the sleeve. "Neville! Have you seen Dean!?"

Neville turned in surprise, looking like the bedraggled hero he'd become. "Real quick, before I answer that, have you seen Luna?"

"Just passed her at the edge of the Clocktower Courtyard," Seamus answered, panting. "Where's Dean?"

"Headed back to the Common Room, last I saw."

"Thanks, Neville!"

Seamus was already turned back and making quick strides away. He reached the Common Room in what felt like heartbeats, aching to do what he should've done before the Battle. He NEEDED Dean to know how he felt- but right now, all he cared about was that Dean was alive.

He burst into the Common Room and found Dean standing in the middle of it looking hopelessly distraught. Seamus strode quickly forward and Dean turned around just before Seamus reached him. All the hopelessness vanished from Dean's posture as the two embraced in a hug that held all the grief and all the triumph and all the fear and all the love that the last night had heralded. Seamus gripped Dean to him, inhaling his best friend's scent and letting it surround him and comfort him the way nothing else could.

Dean withdrew from the hug and placed his hands on Seamus's cheeks in a gesture far too amorous. "I was so damn worried, Seamus. Where'd you disappear to?"

Seamus's heart was pounding in his chest. He'd witnessed a lot of love confessions in the last night, a lot of desperate couples finally uniting, and the shape of Dean's lips nearly had him convinced to join those confessing groups.

"One of the second-years got out and nearly got stunned," Seamus answered. "Had to save him."

"I turned and you were gone," Dean breathed, and they were still standing too close, and Dean's hands were still on Seamus's cheeks, and it was all Seamus could think of. "God, I was so scared."

"I've been looking for you everywhere," Seamus said, because it was the only words he could find. "I'm so- so-"

But "relieved" didn't cover it, and he was far more focused on the proximity of him and Dean, and- and now Dean was leaning down and the silence was full of sparks and-

Then Dean was kissing him.

For a moment, Seamus couldn't believe it was happening. He was convinced he had actually died in the battle and now had ascended to heaven. Then he woke from that thought and was shocked to find this was reality, this was Dean, this was kissing Dean.

Dean moved to pull back and Seamus grabbed him with desperate fingers and searching lips and kissed Dean with five years of need. Their bodies collided and Seamus felt the warmth and muscle of Dean's neck beneath his fingers. Thick, chapped lips were on Seamus's, and it was nothing like he'd ever imagined and it was infinitely better because it was REAL. It was finally real, and it was everything he'd hoped for and dear God he loved it.

When the kiss finally ended, Seamus looked at Dean, and Dean looked at Seamus, and there were no words to encompass the feelings that stretched between them.

Dean's dark eyes were all the grounding Seamus needed, and then Seamus needed just a little bit more. He hugged close to Dean, his head against the taller one's chest, and heard the heartbeat against his ear. For the first time since all this had started, he felt peace.

 **-TTT-**

"So, how long?"

It was three months after the Battle of Hogwarts, just after midnight, and Seamus couldn't be happier. He lounged across Dean's lap on their couch in their flat, some film on the tele in the background, and the smell of freshly brewed tea filled the air.

Seamus looked up at Dean's question. "Hmm?"

"How long have you- you know? ...Me?"

Seamus grinned as his eyes spotted Dean's torso. "Sixth year. I dunno. Longer than that, probably."

Dean's eyebrows rose. "Really?"

Seamus laughed lightly. "I dunno if you realized it but I've been stealing your shirts for quite a long time. It was sixth year when I figured out why."

Dean's eyebrows creased and he glanced down at the v-neck he wore. "Wait- this-?"

"That's the very one, Deanie." Seamus laughed. "It was when Ginny Weasley seemed to want it back and you said I could keep it that I realized I was into you."

"Really? I thought it was longer."

Now Seamus's eyebrows creased. "Wait, why?"

"Just- looks you got. And you were always jealous when I had a girlfriend."

Dean's arm was laid across Seamus's chest and Seamus reached and took Dean's hand possessively. "Well- I tried not to be, at least. Just hard, ya know, when you've got a crush on your best mate and get to watch his every relationship."

"Why didn't you ever have a relationship, Seamus? You just always seemed content so I didn't question it, but I can't remember you ever fancying anyone."

"Just you, mate. For five long years. Just- didn't really feel that way about anyone else."

"If it helps you any, I think I had those feelings for you, too. Used to write to my mum about you all the time. She sat me down after third year to tell me if I were, ya know, gay, she didn't mind."

Seamus frowned. "Wish my mum had been so accepting."

They'd finally told her a month ago, by which point they already lived together, and Mrs. Finnegan had been thoroughly repulsed. Seamus didn't care that much, because he had Dean, and he'd lost so much in the Battle of Hogwarts that it just felt like another casualty.

Dean's hand swept comforting over Seamus's forehead and nestled in his hair. "Hey, love, it's gonna be alright. She'll come around."

"Hopefully," Seamus sighed. "I like to think she will."

"She will."

 **-TTT-**

"So how will we tell him?"

"He won't care, mate; he had the biggest crush on Cedric Diggory. I wasn't the only bi kid at Hogwarts."

"What? He didn't have a crush on-"

"He was so gay for him. It was the weirdest love triangle. Now shut it, he's coming in."

The door swept open and through it came Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley. Seamus took a quick breath through his nose, attempting to stay calm. He won't care, he won't care, he won't care, he repeated to himself. Dean and Seamus had gotten the letter a week ago asking if they'd like to catch up sometime; it seemed Harry and Ginny had news to share as well. Dean and Ginny had made up beyond their past fights in seventh year, and Seamus didn't mind seeing her again, but it was bound to be weird for a moment, since none of them had seen each other in six months.

"Dean! Seamus!" Harry greeted them, and hugs were quickly exchanged, and then the four sat down. A waiter came by in the muggle diner Harry had chosen, and they each ordered their drinks, and then Harry glanced at Ginny. "Shall we go ahead and tell them, then..?"

"I think you should," Ginny replied, and Dean's eyebrows rose while Seamus smiled nervously.

"Okay," Harry said, and turned to the other two. "Ginny and I would like to invite you to our wedding. Both of you."

Seamus chuckled, and Dean congratulated them, "That's fantastic! We'll definitely be there." Dean glanced at Seamus. "I think we have some news as well."

Ginny looked a little over-eager, and Harry had his usual obliviousness. "Oh? What's that?"

Seamus smiled and Dean held his hand under the table.

"Well," Seamus said, "Dean and I are together."

Ginny and Harry glanced at each other, and Harry asked, "In what way?"

"In the same way you and Ginny are together," Dean replied, and Ginny's jaw dropped.

"You're-?"

Dean nodded once, and then Ginny glanced at Seamus, who, conveniently, was wearing that same v-neck.

"And that's why- oh, you two! This is marvelous!"

Dean laughed lightly, and a grin broke out on Harry's face as he asked, "How did I miss this?"

"We were kind of in denial about it ourselves," Seamus answered. "A rather recent development."

"Oh, that's so cute, though!" Ginny exclaimed, clasping her hands together. "When's the wedding? Can I help plan this?"

"Gin," Dean said, "You're not weirded out by this at all?"

"I had my thoughts," she said. "And possibly a bet going with Luna on how long it would take you two to figure it out."

"Ginny!"

"I was right, wasn't I?" She chuckled, and then pursed her lips. "Actually- Luna was. I bet you'd figure it out before you left Hogwarts. She thought it would be after. Damn. Well, I've never minded giving anything to Luna. Oh well."

"Ginny," Dean spoke up, "Have you ever..? I mean, are you also bi?"

"Oh, yes," Ginny answered. "Harry is too, though he doesn't think so. We all saw how he crushed on Cedric in fourth year."

"That's what I said!" Dean exclaimed, and Harry groaned.

"I did not have a crush on Cedric!"

"No, not at all," Seamus said. "You just pined over him a little. Nothing gay about that, not a bit."

Harry sighed, and Ginny grinned at the three. "Oh, this is wonderful. I've met people of the mind we simply don't have 'gays' at Hogwarts. But really, can I plan your wedding?"

Dean laughed, and Seamus replied, "You can help, when we get to that point."

And that was when he realized the idea of his and Dean's wedding had gone from 'if' to 'when' and there in that diner Seamus was the happiest he had ever been.

And it felt, in the moment, all thanks to a certain striped t-shirt.

 _(and they all lived gaily ever after_

 _that was a pun_

 _i need to go to sleep)_


	2. The Sweetest Summer -linny-

"Can I borrow this?"

Ginny, busy unpacking still, didn't look up and simply tossed out, "Sure, Luna."

She finished loosely organizing her trunk's contents into her dresser and tossed the trunk in her closet, a slight frown on her face. "Only two more years at Hogwarts- one for you- feels strange, doesn't it?"

She turned to her best friend to see Luna sitting and quiet and lily pale on her bed, with Ginny's crimson quidditch jersey donned by the girl. Ginny's jaw dropped briefly in shock to see someone else wearing her sweater, especially since it was so oversized on Luna. She nearly asked Luna to remove it, but Luna looked so content, her fists wrapped around the inside of the end of the sleeves and a small smile curving her lips.

"This jersey smells lovely," Luna said, in her light lilting voice, and Ginny stammered for a reply. She hadn't had time to wash the jersey after a few last-day bouts of Shuntbumps with the quidditch team, and knew it couldn't smell any better after holding all her sweat during the long train-ride back. She didn't even understand how Luna had gotten it; the jersey had been in her trunk.

"Oh. That jersey."

"Yes." Luna's eyes shone. "You don't mind, do you?"

Ginny almost corrected her, but then Luna flopped the oversized sleeves around the ends of her small arms, and Ginny melted, smiling. "Not a bit, Luna. Just make sure you leave it here when you return home. It's my favorite, you know."

"I know!"

The days passed on as early summer eased in with all the warmth and light it brought. Having Luna in the Burrow was a unique experience; Ron was downcast at the recent news with Sirius, they all were, but Ginny had an easier time grieving with Luna there.

"Do you ever think about him?" Luna asked one day, quite out of the blue, as the two girls had sat in silence for about an hour, while Ginny read a book on quidditch history and Luna sketched idly in a notebook.

Several faces came to Ginny's mind at 'him'. "Think about who?"

"Harry, of course. Everyone kind of knows you two fancy each other. Do you think about him?"

Aside from grief over Sirius, Ginny realized that for the first summer in five years she hadn't been thinking of Harry. She'd been thinking of Luna. "No, surprisingly. I haven't thought about him hardly at all." Her eyebrows pulled together. "He's brilliant, of course, and I feel grief for what happened at the end of the year; but I don't think he and I will go down that road for some time yet."

Luna was in Ginny's jersey again, and Ginny looked up at her as Luna said, "I just thought, since you're quite grand, there must be a reason you're no one's girlfriend yet."

Ginny laughed. "Must I always be someone's girlfriend?"

"No, but it might be quite nice if you were."

Ginny thought for a moment. "And whose girlfriend would I be? With Harry distraught and school out, I haven't many options. Unless YOU want to be my girlfriend."

"That could be quite nice."

Ginny looked at Luna in shock. "Wait, what?"

"I think we'd make excellent girlfriends, Ginny," Luna said. "We know each other quite well, and you're very pretty, and you've said I'm very pretty. Perhaps we should try it."

Ginny was entirely caught off-guard, wondering if Luna had intended this conversation to head this way- but then, Luna never planned any conversation; she just spoke. Some people were open books; Luna was an open bottle, knocked on its side, that spilled all of its contents easily but always instantly replenished. Luna had never been speechless, as Ginny was now, and had always been quite full of thoughts and free to share them.

"You're serious, then?"

"Oh, completely."

"Then-" Ginny paused, and cleared her throat, and met her best friend's eyes. "Then we should do this right. Luna Lovegood, will you be my girlfriend?"

"Of course, Ginny Weasley!"

It started out simple. Flower crowns, picnics at dawn, taking Luna for flights on Ginny's broom. Teasing from Fred and George, sharing clothes, cheek-kisses when Ginny's mum wasn't around. Then it was cuddling while Ginny read to Luna, because Luna just liked the sound of her voice. Then it was the smooth lily-white skin of Luna's thigh, and the freckles on Ginny's stomach. Then it was the gold flecks in Ginny's eyes, the silver in Luna's, the quiet laughter in the night and the clasped hands during thunderstorms. It was the revealing of long-buried secrets, heartbreaks never dealt with and grief only quieted.

They worked together to help raise the joke-shop from the ground up with Fred and George. When July came around, Luna wrote her father she'd be staying with the Weasley's another two weeks, and she read while Ginny shaped back up for quidditch. When they received letters from friends, both read them to the other and wrote the reply together.

When Hermione visited, she was surprised at the development, but accepting. She reddened and laughed the first time Luna kissed Ginny's cheek in front of her; by the end of the visit, she was ecstatic for the two.

Then it was time for Luna to leave.

Ginny held her girlfriend's hands in the quiet of her room while Xenophilius Lovegood chatted with the Weasleys downstairs. Ginny looked at Luna, and asked, "So, what happens now?"

"We call it a sweet summer, or we carry it out," Luna said. "The choice is yours, really; I don't mind either way, but relationships get messy when other people get involved."

"Then let's call it a slice of perfection," Ginny replied. "The sweetest summer two people could share."

She kissed Luna one last time, and then they said their goodbyes as friends.

When school returned and they reunited, it was as the best friends they had always been, with slightly more affection and no awkwardness. It was perfect for them both.

Three years later, after Hogwarts was only a memory, Luna and Ginny sat at the beach, and Ginny looked at Luna in surprise. "Luna- you've got very pale freckles on your cheeks! You didn't have those when we first met. I remember us talking about your lack of freckles. When did that happen?"

"During the sweetest summer."

Ginny's heart melted there. She and Luna had been spending more time together after Ginny and Harry broke up; it was nothing spiteful, and the pain she felt was at the loss of 'what could've been,' and not 'what was.' Harry had had a lot to deal with, and so had Ginny, after the war. They remained amiable, but weren't to be.

Now, Ginny understood much better why. Her childhood crush and first love weren't the same person. She had babbled to Hermione at the age of fourteen about the wild girl with sparkling raindrop eyes and the sweetest laugh and wildest ideas. Then, it had been what she thought was adoration. She now saw an older meaning of the word was more appropriate.

"I love you," Ginny said.

"I love you, too, Ginny."

Luna took her hand, and Ginny stared at their clasped hands. "No, Luna- more than just as friends."

"I know. I've always known. I just thought you'd come around to it a bit sooner."

Ginny kissed her there on the beach, and they became girlfriends again.

Years later, Molly welcomed Luna as her daughter-in-law, and there was happiness and light, and bold crimson and lily-white, and broomsticks and flower-crowns.

And all was well.


	3. Happy Holidays -wolfstar-

_featuring Sirius & Remus fluff_

* * *

Sirius tacked up the twelfth mistletoe that evening in the central living room and kitchen of the Potters' house. He sat back with satisfied hands on his hips. "There- now I'll _definitely_ get the kiss I've been waiting for!"

James shook his head, looking up at the dozen clumps of leaves and berries hanging from his ceiling. "Are you sure this won't backfire and lead to your target skillfully avoiding all of them, or otherwise not coming out at all, or, worse still, kissing others under the mistletoe all night?"

"I don't even care if he _does_ kiss someone else tonight," Sirius said. "He'll just be awkward about it, give 'em a quick smooch, and walk on. It's a perfect plan, James! He'll be awkward about all the mistletoe and come find me at some point, and I'll be waiting, and give him a _real_ smooch, and then the past year worth of pining will all come together! You know I've been waiting for a mistletoe kiss since last Christmas."

"What, McKinnon wasn't enough?"

"McKinnon made me realize girls weren't quite my thing. No offense to her- she's beautiful- but not what I want." He elbowed James. "C'mon, if Evans _does_ show, you'll be glad I put her in a situation where she has to kiss you!"

"I don't want to coerce the girl!" James said. "That's not exactly the best method of seduction, you know!"

"And if it works? Then you'll be thanking me. Sometimes all it takes a kiss for them to realize their feelings!"

"What if they realize feelings for someone else?"

"They won't. It's fate."

"If the whole world shared your optimism, Sirius Black, it would be far more dangerous."

"What's life without a little adventure?" Sirius crowed, and they resumed the other decorations as they waited. Peter arrived early and went directly to the cheese platter, beginning to eat. Then Dorcas Meadowes arrived with Marlene McKinnon, and James put on a record. The whole sixth year class began to file in over the next hour- Phineus Bones, Artorus Fromm, and so on, filling the Potters' house's lower floor. James kept them _mostly_ confined to the living room, kitchen, and backyard.

Toward the middle of the evening, Lily Evans walked in, red hair like a halo around her unamused expression and sparking green eyes, flanked by Remus and Griffin Scamander.

Sirius met eyes with James and waggled his eyebrows, grinning already. James moved in toward his own goal for the evening- Sirius had talked him into trying to get Lily Evans under the mistletoe- while Sirius downed his whiskey-laced eggnog. Riding liquid confidence, he headed for a bundle of mistletoe in the exact kind of quiet corner Remus would make it around to by the end of the night. Sure, lurking under mistletoe was a bit predictable, but he wasn't here for shock value.

He grinned to see Marlene walking out from beneath the mistletoe. "Deja vu, eh, McKinnon?"

"Like a year hasn't passed, except now you can grow a beard," she teased, and she closed her green eyes to press a quick kiss to his lips before wandering off into the crowd once more.

Last year, kissing McKinnon had been on the top of Sirius's to-do list- she had shape to her figure, a quick wit, gorgeous blonde hair, and a smile that could cripple. Oh, how priorities change. He and Marlene were good friends still, better now that he wasn't annoying her with his thin-veiled attempts at seduction, and even better when he revealed to her why he didn't exactly kiss back. She didn't mind a bit.

The party continued; Sirius grinned when he spotted James dancing with Evans- she looked irritated and he was grinning, so she'd probably just insulted him heavily. He pinched her cheek and she slapped him, and Sirius laughed as he turned away. Eventually, James would learn that annoying her wasn't really the way to her heart. Sirius glanced around again- and realized Remus was nowhere in the living room.

He headed off through the kitchen but he wasn't there either, and didn't show up in the backyard. "Weird," Sirius muttered. He refilled his own glass and fixed one for his friend, and then headed upstairs, going to the guest bedroom where they'd be staying that night. He walked in to find Remus sitting on the bed, writing something. Sirius wandered over.

"Your muse sparked?"

Remus forced a half-smile. "Just feeling a little detached. You know parties aren't exactly my scene."

"Ah." Remus wagged his pen over the page as though he'd forgotten the words he'd planned, and then jotted down a few more and looked up.

"By all means, head back down; I didn't mean to interrupt your partying."

Sirius chuckled and sat on the bed next to Remus. "It's no fun without you there."

Remus cocked an eyebrow, his dark blue eyes meeting Sirius's. "Oh yes, I'm sure my fretting and disapproval makes me just the _life_ of the party."

"Feels a little empty without it." Sirius bumped Remus with his shoulder. "Ah, c'mon- you can finish sulking and writing poetry later! Come downstairs. I won't even ask you to dance. Just come socialize a bit. I'll be right by your side the whole evening."

"You're not going to pressure me into walking under the mistletoe with some girl I hardly know again, are you?"

Sirius chuckled. "Not this year."

"What, too busy kissing McKinnon to bother with my affairs?"

Sirius nearly gaped at his friend. "You still didn't realize-?"

"Realize what? Don't tell me you went through all that last year and you still don't have genuine feelings for her?"

Sirius laughed and shook his head. "Oh, Remus, you can be _so_ oblivious. Come with me, I want to show you something."

He stood up and set the eggnogs on the end table so he could move Remus's notebook. Remus sighed and closed the notebook, set it on the bed, and stood. Sirius passed his friend one of the eggnogs.

"You're going to want this. I think a little buzz will help you."

Remus's caution was evident, but Sirius was having none of it. He grabbed his own drink and led Remus by the hand out of the room, into the hall, and back down the stairs. He nearly walked right into James, who led a laughing Lily toward the stairs. Lily's eyes were bright and her cheeks were red, and James was smiling like he'd just seen the sun for the first time in years.

"She's laughing at my quidditch figurines," James informed Sirius in quick words, "So I'm showing her the collection."

Sirius grinned and shook his head; both of them were intent on their goals. He maneuvered through the crowd, hearing Remus's mumbled apologies behind him, passing Peter dancing with Dorcas, spotting Marlene cozied up to a Ravenclaw Sirius didn't remember the name of. He moved on through the crowd and reached the small corner. Remus had apparently chugged his drink on the way, and looked at Sirius curiously.

"Why are we-?"

Sirius pointed up before Remus could finish the question. His heart pounded in his chest and his mouth was dry. _This was the moment._

Remus glanced up and saw the mistletoe and when he turned back to Remus his expression was one of surprise.

Sirius grabbed Remus and pulled him close, burying his hands in Remus's hair, and crushed his lips to his. He moved his lips over Remus's, kissing with the passion of a year's restraint, his mind flickering to when he'd been kissing Marlene and wishing it was Remus. Remus tasted like chocolate and eggnog, and his lips were supple and unmoving- _unmoving._

Sirius lurched back and looked at his friend. " _That's_ why I don't have feelings for Marlene. I didn't- I mean- are you- do you-"

Before he could even stammer out his self-doubt, Remus grabbed Sirius by the neck and yanked him back, kissing him with unexpected ferocity. It was gnashing teeth and bitten lips and Sirius's back against the wall and Remus's hands tangled in his hair, bodies pressed close together, and it was tongues and exploration and it was evident Remus had restrained just as much as Sirius had and the final release of tension was all the more beautiful for it.

When they finally pulled apart, it took them both a moment to catch their breath. Remus faced Sirius with shining cobalt eyes, and Sirius stared back with cinder elation.

"You, too?"

"Only for you." Remus took a breath, still catching his breath. "How long have you…?"

"Since last Christmas."

Remus's eyebrows rose. "You, the one with the worst impulse problems, made it that long without spilling your secrets everywhere?"

"Oh, I mean, pretty much everyone else knew- Marlene, James, Peter, I even made a joke to Griffin Scamander once by accident. I also submitted an assignment to McGonagall with our initials sketched in the margin."

"Good Lord, when you said 'everyone', you really meant it." He shook his head. "Why not just _tell_ me?"

"And have you reject me or stop being my friend? I'd risk my life for you, but I wouldn't risk losing you like that." Sirius cupped Remus's cheek in his hand and Remus's eyes fluttered for a moment as he leaned into Sirius's hold. Sirius's voice dropped to a whisper. "Sorry I didn't tell you before. I was afraid, and that's hard for me to admit."

"I know. It's the same reasons I didn't tell you. I didn't tell anyone else- I didn't ever want you to find out." A smile spread across Remus's face, the genuine kind that that had stolen Sirius's heart in the first place. "I'm glad I found out this way. How'd you find the courage?"

"Eggnog. James suggested the mistletoe as a joke, but I needed the alcohol to enforce the confidence."

Remus chuckled. "You've really got to stop taking jokes as serious suggestions."

"But Remus, if I hadn't taken it _seriously,_ I wouldn't be where I am now." He kissed Remus's forehead, with ease as Remus was half a head shorter than him, "And where I am now," he kissed Remus's cheek, "Is bloody perfect."

He touched his lips to Remus's, kissing him one more time, long and slow this time, more tenderness than passion. Then-

"Oi, stop hogging the mistletoe! Go to your room or something!"

Sirius peeked out from the corner as Remus hid a red face in his chest. James stood with an exasperated Lily Evans walking away from him as though she'd realized his plan. James was grinning, drunken eyes shining, and raised his glass.

"Proud of you two! 'Bout time you stop _mooning_ over each other in secret!"

"I'm killing both of you," Remus mumbled from Sirius's sweater.

Sirius just laughed and wrapped his arms around Remus. "Hey, Moony?"

"Yes, Padfoot?"

"Are we, like, boyfriends now?"

"If you want, Padfoot."

And he hugged his boyfriend under the mistletoe; all was perfect, if for a night, in Sirius's world.

 **l-l**

 _[in messy scrawled handwriting on a weathered notebook]_

 _the night is chaos_

 _filled with moving bodies_

 _dancing, drinking, diving under mistletoe_

 _he kisses her_

 _a reminder of my foolishness_

 _he laughs, turns away,_

 _i retreat_

 _the night wanes on_

 _the bass thrums below_

 _he opens the door, persuading eyes-_

 _should i go?_

 _after midnight:_

 _i owe clarity to mistletoe_

 _who knew poison could prompt passion?_

 _i owe an herb my happiness,_

 _and as he sleeps on my arm i smile._

 _my shining star, the smile i dreamed-_

 _finally, finally, it's all for me._


	4. Burning Love -charlie weasley-

It started in third year, the first day of Care of Magical Creatures, though it was years before Charlie Weasley realized that was the start.

A misty September morning greeted Charlie as he wandered out of the Great Hall for his first class of Care of Magical Creatures. His best friend, Nymphadora Tonks, laughed next time with bright eyes, her mind working mischief and her tongue speaking plots. She was a grand mischief maker, and no one ever suspected her- sometimes he envied that she was a metamorphagus, but she always used it to his advantage, too.

Then, as they started out the front door to go find Professor Kettleburn, Cecilia Brewer approached them, looking flushed and eyes twinkling.

"Er, hi! Charlie!"

He smiled politely as Tonks went quiet next to him. "Hullo, Cecilia."

"I was just- er- I just wanted- to- can I ask you something?"

Charlie saw Tonks smirking and wondered what he'd missed. "Er- sure?"

"Will you go to Hogsmeade with me? I- I mean- as a date?"

His eyebrows rose. "A date?"

The prospect had never occurred to him. He supposed an afternoon in Hogsmeade with Cecilia would be pleasant- she had always been good for a laugh, and the girl could drown you in sarcasm. But Charlie didn't exactly think those were the right reasons to go on a date with someone. There was an emotion he had read about that he didn't quite feel for her.

"Er- yes, that is, if you want to."

She looked so hopeful and his heart twisted. "I... I don't know if that would be the best idea, Cecilia."

And he all but ran to Care of Magical Creatures.

The next weekend he'd thought about it, processed the event, and heard some very poignant words from Tonks on the matter. He pulled Cecilia aside and spoke to her in careful tones.

"I'm sorry- you're... Beautiful, and clever, and hilarious, and I do care about you, but I'm not sure I feel that way about people."

Her eyebrows creased. "What way?"

"Like..." He struggled to articulate. He had mulled it over plenty, but he couldn't think of how to put it into words. "Like that butterflies-in-your-stomach feeling where you want to- to kiss someone and hold their hand or whatever. I've never wanted to ask anyone on a date. And I'm sure if I did feel that way about people, I'd definitely want to go on a date with you, but I don't and I don't want to lead you on."

She stepped closer. "I- I think I understand. Could you, maybe, er, go to Hogsmeade with me anyway? I- I think it would be nice if we were to just hang out."

Charlie smiled, relieved she'd taken it well. "Of course!"

It only advanced two months later.

The Forbidden Forest was drenched in snow when Professor Kettleburn led the class out into the woods. Tonks was joking about how she'd set up James Killian and Ophelia Nott on a date, and Cecilia was walking with them, shocked as she learned the truth about Charlie's best friend.

Then they had emerged in the clearing, and Charlie met his one true love:

An antipodean opaleye was tied to a tree. She was the most beautiful thing Charlie had ever seen.

For the first time in his life, Charlie was obsessed, passionate, in need of someone's presence- and it was a dragon. For the next four years, that didn't change.

He petitioned Professor Kettleburn constantly to bring in dragons. Charlie read every book in the library and spent every holiday break asking his parents about it. Bill teased him when Charlie never did go on a date to Hogsmeade- but there was something far more interesting than dating: there was dragons.

It was when Bill got married that Charlie realized he really hadn't ever fallen in love with anything but dragons.

And it wasn't that he wanted to kiss the dragon or hold its claw- that was laughable to even imagine- but that he finally had a passion. At Christmas, Bill was talking about Fleur, and then George about Angelina and Ron about Hermione, even Ginny had someone. And Charlie was showing off pictures of his dragons that he'd been training and taking care of. They were beautiful.

Charlie Weasley was thirty-nine years old when he first came across the term "aromantic", and forty at "aro/ace". But it didn't matter, because he achieved label he wanted when he was eighteen:

Charlie Weasley, Dragon-Handler.


End file.
